Story #19: The Producers
So we're sitting around at one of the local hotspots for nightlife in Smalltown, one of the few places for the hip and trendy that are open late, a disreputable establishment and local favorite called Wendy's. Janine has come along because she is allured by the smell of grease and preservatives, and we are all sighing contentedly at the table, looking down at demolished brown plastic trays of hamburger wrappers and fry shavings.
In the glorious food-induced coma that we all are in, we decide it would be a good idea to write, direct, and produce a theater production for the residents of Smalltown. Matt immediately cottons to the idea of doing Macbeth, while Ryan wants to do Macbeth...In Space! (Actual quote: "So she'll be like, 'Out, out, damned spot!' and there will be little globules of blood floating in zero gravity...") Janine suggests doing a musical.
This rapidly deteriorates into a rapid-fire stream-of-consciousness set of suggestions for a diverse set of possible productions, including:
-Rosencrantz and Guildenstern....In Space! (The Musical)
-Glengarry Glen Ross...In Space! (The Musical) [Sample song: Where are the ****ing leads, my leads, my leads... *snap snap snap*]
-Ayn Rand: The Musical...In Space!
-Moby Dick...In Space! (The Musical)
-AppleShop in Space: The Musical!
-The JFK Assassination Musical: In Space! [Sample setting: he sits there on the twentieth Space-floor of the Texas Space-Book Depository with his Space-rifle and Oliver Stone doing his Space-"Documentary"...]
-World War One: The Musical! (In Space!)
Which would open with a group of townspeople/chorus in Space-Serbia floating around in zero gravity singing "The Archduke is dead, the Archduke is dead, the Archduke is dead, all praise the Black Hand for the proper application of slugs of lead...laid him to rest now the Archduke is dead..." and some Space Austro-Hungarians consulting the Space Ghost of Otto von Bismarck on the wisdom of starting a two-front war...